So it’s 2020 – the year of the coronavirus.
And there are currently millions of people in some form of isolation.
Many of the women in my community have reached out for help with adjusting to the many challenges this change has brought about – but in particular, how to create a routine. (Closely followed by how do I stop eating the contents of my fridge every day…)
To begin here, I think it’s going to be very different depending on whether you have children, whether you’re attempting home schooling, you’re trying to work from home, or you’re recently unemployed.
Here’s what I suggest you do:
Step #1 Write down the things you must do every day to feel like you have lived a normal life and accomplished some stuff.
Examples include:
- Coffee out first thing in the morning
- Doing your hair and makeup
- Listening to your favourite podcast
- Making sure you get to the gym
- Completed some work tasks or made progress on a project
- Talking to your mum
- 30 minutes with your partner before bed to talk through the day as it was
Step #2 If any of those essentials are now challenging or just impossible, decide on how you will do them differently or how you can exchange your old normal for a new normal.
- Coffee first thing in the morning – invest in a coffee machine
- Doing your hair and makeup – do it even if you’re not going out OR create a new “minimalist look” for at home so you feel fresh
- Listening to your favourite podcast – choose a new time to listen or volunteer to go to the shops and listen on the way
- Making sure you get to the gym – set a specific time for online workouts or invest in online personal training
- Completed some work tasks or made progress on a project – schedule this into your day even if you have kids – just 30 mins can be enough to make you feel useful and productive (and not resent your kids for stealing your work time)
- Talking to your mum – Skype, facetime, zoom – make it fun with a cuppa or a bevvie, or do a workout or yoga together
- 30 minutes with your partner before bed to talk through the day as it was – prioritise this time and keep the conversation optimistic and future focused with plans and dreams you share together
Step #3 Here’s where we split up…
Here are my sample routines, depending on your situation…
No kids, no employment
If you’ve lost your job, I’m really sorry. Try to have faith that everything will work out and see this as a time for personal growth and self care.
It is likely that you’re going to be feeling a lot of emotions right now including fear, hopelessness, loneliness, even anger.
Talk it out don’t bottle it up, and allow yourself to grieve your old life.
Where previously your days were set, even cluttered, they may feel awfully long and empty in isolation.
There is a danger here for some bad health habits to creep in and eventually for anxiety and depression to take over, so my best advice would be to sit down and do some planning.
I don’t mean you need to be able to map out how to save your job or turn your life around. What I mean is, how are you going to make your days productive and satsfying?
What are the things that make you feel worthwhile as a person? What lights you up and motivates you?
What are some of the day to day tasks that make things feel ‘normal’?
You need to create rituals and routines around these things.
Get up and make your bed. Get dressed and do your hair.
Sign up for a free online course. Volunteer to get groceries for your elderly neighbour.
Facetime with your extended family you never really talk to. Online shop for gifts for all your nieces and nephews.
Keep a basic cleaning schedule, take regular exercise, plan your meals and cook from scratch.
You might be in a really s#^t situation, but you also have a unique opportunity to do things just for you, that you’ve always wanted to do.
I’m not saying this is an easy time for you, but what I am saying is that there’s not much you can do about what’s happening in the world and in the workforce, so the more you can flip your mindset to opportunity town, the better you’ll come through this job or no job.
Work from home, no kids
This is all about structure and making it as easy as possible to stay on task.
Working from home can be amazing because you get to choose (to some extent) how you arrange your time. The challenge is actually arranging it, not winging it, not spending the day in your pyjamas and turning up to zoom meetings with a collared shirt and tracksuit bottoms.
Remember that the better your work is going, the better your free time will be and the better you will feel about yourself. So get up, dress up and show up!
Create a schedule with just a few “must do’s” – too many and you’re already failing. You’ll give up before you know it.
Once you’ve put the “must do’s” in, put in a few “feel goods.” This could be a walk at lunch time, a timer set for 50 minutes giving you a 10 minute break every hour, or if you’re a flow type person (i.e. you get into flow and go go go), designate a couple of hours break before or after this time of intense productivity to recharge fully.
Plan your meal breaks and actually cook, have strategic snacks available, create a ‘tea station’, log out of facebook and close your emails for those 50 minutes.
Do what you have to do to make working productively from home easy.
(BTW you can buy child locks for your fridge and they’re really annoying to unlock all the time… a great mindless snacking deterrent!)
Work from home, young kids
Girlfriend…. I know.
First thing for you to do is forgive yourself and lower your expectations. Full stop. Period.
Second, decide when you can actually sit down and work and focus.
If that is during nap times – that’s when you work.
If you can get your partner or family member to safely watch the kids while you lock yourself in a room for two hours – that is your work time.
If you have to stay up til 10 or 11 o’clock to feel satisfied with the amount of work, then put your feet up all morning and supervise the kids from the couch. If you do get a small break during the day, brain dump your to-do’s into notepad to free up your head, but also to be able to get right to work when it’s go time.
If you are really swamped you need to reconsider what’s doable. If you work for a company have a serious chat about your workload, and if you work for yourself, evaluate your priorities, your needs and then make decisions to cut down your work. You’ve just got to do what you’ve got to do.
Homeschooling mum
Yee ha! …
I have seen so many posts and comments on social media about schedules for home schooling and how much work they should be doing and blah blah blah…
Many of these were literally the day after the first level of business closures were announced when people were starting to voluntarily take their kids out of school.
First up, don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Your children will not lose their intelligence if you don’t do 2 hours of maths every day with them.
Choose a schedule that works for you and take this opportunity to teach them age appropriate ‘real-life’ stuff!
Work on projects, not timetables.
Have adventures in the garden or out on walks, teach them to cook and use the washing machine, teach them what’s under the bonnet of the car and how to grow vegetables, teach them that creativity and expression in art and music are not only valid but much needed sources of joy, hope and inspiration in the world. Exercise together, watch unusual films or educational documentaries.
And if they’re still getting work from school then I guess try to do that too!
But encourage them to take responsibility over their learning and take pride in their accomplishments. Where they may feel like one in the crowd at school, or constantly feeling left out, or compared to other kids, it’s now all about their own personal development and that’s a really special thing.
Just remember that while this is not going to last forever, it’s not going to be a 2 week stint either, and a burnt out mum and frustrated kids does not make for a happy home.
Don’t be too hard on yourself, or your kids, it really is a strange time and whether they’re showing it or not, they will be affected by what is going on in the world too.
Working mum
If your job is essential and you’re still working at this time, focus as much as you can on relaxing and restoring your energy and your health in your time off.
Working in industry right now is going to be even more stressful than usual whether you’re on the front line in health care or trying to keep your business or job alive while customers are starting to disappear.
There are only so many things you can control right now and how you spend your time looking after your health and wellbeing is one of them.
Despite all of us at home ‘doing it tough’ with work and kids, you are out there trying to avoid infection, and having to worry about the potential risks every single day. That’s a heavy load to bear, let alone work with and around people who are all having a hard time right now.
Take it easy and do your best to just do the bare minimum around what you have to get done right now. Take rest, eat well, get fresh air and sunshine and stay socially connected.
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I hope that’s been helpful in some way, and if you’d love some more community and support, come and join my facebook group: Optimal Health & Self Care For Busy Women
Listen to the podcast: www.thegreenbodyplan.com/podcast
And grab my free Burnout to Balance Guide: https://go.thegreenbodyplan.com/free-burnout-guide
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Kelly Moriarty is an online women’s health & nutrition coach and founder of The Green Body Plan.
After 5 years as a veterinarian Kelly was completely burnt out, battling frequent colds, chronic back pain, anxiety and eventually depression.
She re-evaluated her perceptions of success, trained as a yoga teacher, personal trainer and nutritionist and opened a gym with her husband Andy.
She now helps women make the same changes that she did to manage stress and anxiety naturally so that they can live the full and rewarding lives they desire.
kellyannmoriarty.com 